Chapter 103: Drunk
Li Mu had no interest in drinking alcohol. Even after going through something really upsetting, he never planned to drink to forget his problems.
He was the kind of good guy who didn’t smoke, didn’t drink, didn’t have tattoos, and didn’t gamble.
Well… maybe still counted as a guy, sort of...
It was already 7 p.m., not a busy time for dinner, so the food delivery arrived in less than half an hour.
Li Mu rarely ordered such expensive food. Especially crayfish, he had only eaten it once in his life. Even though he was from a coastal area, he just didn’t get what people liked about it.
It was expensive, hard to peel, had little meat, and all the flavor came from the sauce. He thought regular shrimp tasted better and were easier to eat.
But since he was treating Yu Fan to dinner, he had to consider what Yu Fan liked. After eating together a few times, he noticed Yu Fan liked food with strong flavors.
“Why are you being so generous today?” Yu Fan asked while putting on the disposable gloves and peeling crayfish for himself.
“No reason,” Li Mu replied, still looking at his phone while eating a skewer of meat.
“Did you win the lottery or something?”
Yu Fan knew that Li Mu’s family wasn’t very well-off. That’s why he usually tried to help Li Mu save money when they hung out.
When Li Mu didn’t answer, Yu Fan guessed again. “Did something really good happen?”
Well… if the medical exam said he had actually turned into a girl and not a futanari, maybe that counted as something good...
But still, it felt like he was stabbed in the heart.
“What’s it to you if I spend my own money?”
“Tsk, your temper is starting to sound more like a girl’s.”
Li Mu had nothing to say to that. He quietly put on his gloves and tried eating one crayfish.
The last time he ate crayfish was back in middle school. So peeling the shell was super hard for him now. After a long struggle, all he got was a mess of broken shell and meat.
“You need to squeeze it a little, then peel the first two segments. Once you see a bit of meat, just suck it out and it comes right out.”
“Too much work,” Li Mu muttered as he took off the gloves and went back to eating the barbecue.
Yu Fan could tell something was definitely up with him today. Xiao Jing calling him over probably wasn’t just a prank. Otherwise, Li Mu wouldn’t be acting so weird.
After thinking for a moment, Yu Fan held out a piece of crayfish meat. “Here.”
“???”
Li Mu turned his head, confused, only to see the crayfish meat getting closer and closer. Before he could react, it was already pressed against his lips.
Without thinking, he opened his mouth and bit down. He chewed a few times, then suddenly realized what had just happened.
“Are you crazy?”
What kind of man feeds another man like that?! It was way too... gay!
Was this guy really trying to make a move on him?!
But Yu Fan didn’t think anything was weird about it. He just calmly explained. “You obviously don’t know how to eat it. Since you paid, I’ll help you peel some. What’s crazy about that?”
"After I peeled them, there's no place to put them." He raised his head and glanced at Li Mu. "What's wrong? You can't possibly be shy, right?"
Maybe… friends feeding each other wasn’t that strange?
Seeing Yu Fan’s casual reaction, Li Mu, who had never really had a close friend before, started to feel unsure of himself.
Maybe he was just overthinking it?
His expression turned colder, and he replied, “Put the peeled ones in the barbecue box. I’ll eat them myself.”
Yu Fan took a sip of his drink and grinned. “You know, my neighbor invited me to a seafood buffet tonight. I said no and came to hang out with you instead. Happy?”
“Neighbor?”
“Yeah, the one you met before, the girl who dragged me to the movies.”
“Oh, your childhood friend.”
“Please, that girl’s super annoying. She’s disturbing my playtime.”
And that made Li Mu even more suspicious that this guy really was up to something with him.
From the very beginning, tricking him into wearing women’s clothes, to later getting possessed by Lin Xi’s ghost, maybe all of it was part of this guy’s plan?
They ate barbecue and crayfish for a full hour.
Yu Fan drank six bottles of beer. His face was now as red as a monkey’s butt, his eyes were unfocused, and his movements were slow as he finished peeling the last crayfish for Li Mu.
Li Mu didn’t hold back, he grabbed the crayfish and stuffed it into his mouth, then turned to look at Yu Fan.
Yu Fan’s tone had gone from warm and cheerful to slurred and silly, and his usual bright smile had turned into a stupid grin.
“Only six bottles…” Li Mu frowned. If he’d known Yu Fan couldn’t handle alcohol, he wouldn’t have bought beer in the first place.
“No more?” Yu Fan shook his head while rummaging through the delivery bag, searching for beer. Finally, he looked up at him.
Li Mu shook his head and stood up to clean up the table.
It was the first time he had seen Yu Fan look like this.
Suddenly, an idea came to him. He picked up his phone and took a photo of Yu Fan’s silly drunk face. Only then did he smile a little.
Yu Fan didn’t react at all, just stared blankly at the TV.
“I should head home.”
Yu Fan noticed the time in the corner of the TV screen. He tried to get up, but his legs gave out and he fell back onto the couch.
Li Mu sighed, poured a glass of warm water from the kettle, and put it on the table. “Drink some water.”
Yu Fan shook his head hard. “I want more beer.”
Normally, a man acting cute like that would just give people goosebumps. But Yu Fan was good-looking, so somehow it didn’t seem that bad.
Clearly he was the one in a bad mood today, so how did Yu Fan end up drunk instead?
“It’s all gone. There’s no more,” Li Mu said as he packed up the trash, opened the door, and placed the bag outside. Then he added, “Take it out when you leave.”
But Yu Fan had already somehow rolled onto the floor. He was lying flat on his back with his arms and legs spread out, eyes half-closed.
Li Mu had never drunk alcohol before, but he’d seen others drunk. Normally, six beers shouldn’t make someone this out of it.
Also, he had heard that drunk people are often still aware of what they’re doing, they don’t really just forget everything like in the movies.
So he walked over and looked down at Yu Fan.
“What are you trying to do?”
“I think I’ll stay here tonight… look at me.”
That weird feeling, like Yu Fan was up to something, was getting stronger.
Li Mu stared at his face, then lifted his foot.
His bare foot stopped right at the tip of Yu Fan’s nose. But Yu Fan didn’t react at all.
Hmm.
Didn’t seem like he was faking it.
If he weren’t drunk, he would’ve flinched or moved away by instinct.
“Fine, you can sleep on the couch,” Li Mu said as he squatted down and gently took Yu Fan’s phone out of his pocket. He put it in Yu Fan’s hand and said, “Call your family and let them know.”
“Okaaay~” Yu Fan replied in a long, lazy tone.
Li Mu looked at his dumb, silly expression and couldn’t help but smile a little. He felt amused and happy to see him like this.
From now on, if he wanted to mess with Yu Fan, all he had to do was get him drunk.
Right now, the most important thing was to make Yu Fan do something embarrassing, then record it with photos or videos. Later, he could use it for blackmail.
Too bad the girls’ clothes were still locked in the dorm room. Otherwise, he would’ve dressed Yu Fan up right now.
With a mischievous smile, he turned on the camera on his phone, stayed squatting next to Yu Fan, and softly asked,
“Yu Fan, who do you like?”
“I like all the pretty ones…”
Pervert alert!
“Then… what do you usually cast spells on?”
Yu Fan was taken aback for a moment, then raised his head to look at Li Mu.
Li Mu was also stunned, suddenly feeling a bad premonition.
“Of course I use Asuna doujinshi!”