Chapter 163: The Past
Evelia covered Armand’s eyes. She just wanted him to take a short nap during this quiet moment. But now, all she could feel was how his eyelashes were tickling her palm.
“Mr. Armand,” Evelia opened her fingers a little, letting his restless eyes peek through. “Can’t you fall asleep?”
“Hmm…” Armand let out an awkward chuckle. “Yeah… I’m having a hard time sleeping.”
“But you look really tired.”
“Being able to sleep doesn’t always depend on how tired your body is. It depends on whether your mind is calm enough. If you really want me to sleep, it might be faster if you just punch me—”
Before he could finish, he noticed a shadow on his face. When he looked up, he saw Evelia had already raised her fist like she was ready to hit him.
“—I was joking!”
Seeing that, Armand quickly stopped her from throwing what looked like a serious punch. With Evelia’s strength, if she really hit his face like that, he figured his life might just end early.
“I can control my strength, Mr. Armand. I’d just put you to sleep for a day.”
“That’s still not okay…!”
Hearing such a dangerous comment, Armand quickly sat up, trying to avoid any “accidents.” But just as he got up, Evelia pulled him back down, placing his head on her lap again.
“......” Evelia pouted a little. “I won’t hurt you. Don’t leave.”
She gently brushed his bangs aside and touched his cheek. Her face didn’t show much emotion, but her voice was clearly softer now, not as fierce as before. It felt like she didn’t want Armand to leave.
“…Haa…”
He let out a sigh, whether it was from relief or frustration, he wasn’t sure. His feelings were all mixed up.
“Mr. Armand, why can’t you sleep?”
“Ah…”
Honestly, what he was most worried about was Evelia doing something to him while he was asleep. So even though lying on her lap felt physically comfortable, mentally he was on edge the whole time.
If only when she said “I won’t hurt you,” she had truly meant it from the heart… If that were the case, maybe he really could relax a little.
“…It’s nothing much. I just have a lot of dreams.”
But he couldn’t tell the real reason, not to the person involved.
No matter how he looked at it, from any angle, Armand couldn’t bring himself to say something like, “I can’t sleep because of you.”
So instead, he gave another reason, which was also true. Another cause of his insomnia, the nightmares.
It had already been more than ten years since that incident.
To be honest, his memory of those days was starting to fade.
Back then, his life was completely lost and confused. He didn’t know night from day, or what season it was.
He had already been thinking about running away. So to make it harder for people to remember him in the future, he always wore a black cloak and almost never took it off. He didn’t fix his hair either, his messy black bangs covered his face, hiding everything in darkness.
He knew that a person’s appearance changes the most between youth and adulthood. That’s why he decided he had to escape while he was still young. If he could just hide for a few more years after that, the whole thing would fade away with time, and he’d finally be free.
But later, he met that little kid, the one who looked even younger than Armand had been when he was first brought there. The kid was very thin and weak, like he hadn’t eaten properly for a long time.
Because of his family background, Armand had always been a kind and caring person. His gentleness wasn’t fake. His parents were warm and treated others well, and he learned from them. He tried to share that same kindness with others. It was just that the harsh environment back then had made him hide that part of himself. Still, he helped the little kid, acting like a big brother.
Just like a kid who wanted to share everything good, he told the boy, “I’ll definitely take you out of here.”
And honestly, he did… halfway.
He really did get that kid out of the cage. But they were both still young back then, and in the end, they made a mistake.
—“Stay here and don’t move. I’ll come back for you.”
That was the last thing Armand said to that kid. Because in the end, he couldn’t come back.
Even though the blow meant to pierce his heart was blocked by the pocket watch he always kept in his chest pocket, the rest of his body was still badly hurt from the surprise attack. He couldn’t hold on and ended up falling straight off a cliff.
He could’ve made it out safely.
If he had really left that kid behind, he probably could’ve gone somewhere far away and stayed hidden for a few years. After that, everything would’ve faded with time, and he’d finally be free.
The people chasing him were covered in blood and even had pieces of the boy’s clothing in their hands, shouting that “the other one is already dead.” But even then, Armand still wanted to go back and see for himself.
Because… that was our promise.
After that, his life became like this.
He escaped from that place, only to end up in a new kind of cage.
His memories of the past had grown blurry, partly because, like Evelia, he didn’t want to remember, and partly because of all the poisons and drugs he had been forced to take.
He often joked that if he somehow lived to old age, he’d probably spend most of it with memory loss.
These days, even remembering names was hard for him.
Thankfully, because of his training back then, he had developed a habit of noticing little things in daily life, turning them into small stories to enjoy, rather than trying to memorize long, complicated names.
Even as a kid, he hated memorizing stuff, hated studying useless poetry and literature. And now that he was older, that hadn’t changed at all.
He was only twenty-six, but he often called himself “almost thirty” or even “an old man.” In his eyes, thirty already felt like the later years of his life.
“Mr. Armand… what kind of dreams do you usually have?” Evelia asked softly.
“Nothing much,” Armand shook his head. “Just some old memories. Everyone has a past.”
“…I see.”
Evelia lowered her head. She wanted to look at Armand, but he wasn’t looking at her.
From Evelia’s point of view, Armand was just a guy who laughed and smiled all the time, like someone who didn’t have any worries at all.
So when he mentioned “old memories,” did he mean something precious to him?
“Mr. Armand… is there someone in your dreams that you can’t forget?”
“Hm? I guess you could say that.”
“I see…”
Evelia mumbled softly.
“To be remembered by someone like you, Mr. Armand… that person must be very lucky…”