Chapter 324: A Conversation
It seemed that the closer things got to the end, the clearer Armand's memories of the past became.
He stood by the window. The cold frost on the glass captured the shape of his hand. Maybe it was because of the snow falling outside that made everything seem darker, but with the help of the light inside the room, Armand could clearly see his own tired face reflected in the glass.
He didn’t know exactly when it started, but lately, he found himself remembering the past more and more.
His recent memories were becoming blurry, but those from his youth were growing clearer. He remembered many things.
How he was just a new recruit in the knights' order…
How after escaping, he couldn’t adjust to a normal life and kept hiding everywhere…
How, in the House of Nightingales, there were moments shared between him and that child, that friend.
It was kind of ironic. He originally wanted to escape because of that child, but in the end, he couldn’t even bring him out of there.
All these years, it looked like he had escaped, but in truth, he was still living under the shadow of the past.
Through the window, Armand saw Evelia downstairs, hurrying to bring in the bedding before the snow got heavier. Maybe because his memories weren’t complete, Armand suddenly felt like Evelia had become a completely different person.
In the parts of his memory that remained, Evelia was a quiet, stiff person, like someone trained strictly by the Second Prince. But now, she seemed… more human.
...That was a good thing.
No matter which version of Armand you asked, he would say the same.
Whether it was Evelia, who had learned to understand emotions, or Armand, who was trying to atone for his past, either way, this was a good thing.
Maybe he should even celebrate a little. After all, he had saved someone.
Back then, he failed to save his friend. So now, he had to save even more people to make up for it.
Thinking like that, he quietly praised the version of himself that he had now “forgotten.” That version didn’t let down his own heart.
But there was still sadness in him, because he had forgotten too much. So much that he didn’t even know what Evelia had been through to become the way she was now.
His current image of Evelia mostly came from that first spring when they met. He had already forgotten so many things that happened between them.
At that time, Evelia had been someone he watched closely. He ate strange tomato-based dishes while secretly observing her, this overly serious and oddly-behaving young maid.
From the beginning, he had planned to save Evelia. And in the end, he succeeded.
But because the gaps in his memory were so large, Armand now felt like he was in some kind of fantasy novel, like he had time-traveled. It didn’t feel like he had simply lost memories, but more like he had leapt from the past into the future.
Still, seeing everyone living peacefully…
Seeing that the things he had feared when he first returned to the capital never came true…
Seeing Evelia, whom he had wanted to save, really begin to live a normal life…
All of this made Armand feel a kind of happiness that was hard to describe.
“Mr. Armand, it’s cold by the window. Come back to bed,” came Evelia’s voice.
Just a moment ago, she had been busy downstairs. Now she was standing behind him, the snow on her clothes already shaken off. She carried a tray and slipped in through the small door left open just for her.
“Mm.”
The snow was beautiful, but it didn’t suit him. He liked snow, but that didn’t mean the snow liked him. Those pure little snowflakes would only turn into coldness, and this winter would be the one that took his life.
Armand pulled the curtains closed, hiding his own pitiful reflection, and obediently walked over to Evelia. He sat down on the bed, which wasn’t very soft because of his personal habits.
Compared to the old Armand, he was much quieter now.
He simply lifted his head and silently looked at Evelia as she came closer and poured him a cup of warm milk.
Those fading, blurry memories couldn’t change the fact that Armand loved Evelia. Even if he didn’t remember much, deep in his heart, he still believed in the girl in front of him and saw her as his lover, based on nothing but his feelings and his intuition.
“Mr. Armand, drink slowly. It’s still hot.”
“Mm, okay. Thank you.”
Even though Armand had a lot on his mind, he just silently drank his milk. Maybe he saw it like watered-down beer used to kill time. The more he drank, the faster he drank, until just a few breaths later, the warm milk meant to help him sleep was already gone. He wiped his lips with his thumb and set the empty cup on the table.
“Would you like more?”
Because he drank it so fast, Evelia thought he must be very thirsty and got ready to head downstairs to bring him another cup.
But before she could turn around, Armand reached out and grabbed her wrist.
“...?”
Evelia looked puzzled and put the cup down. She stayed by Armand’s side.
“Is something wrong, Mr. Armand?”
She turned around, leaned down, and looked at him with concern as she saw the complicated look on his face.
“No, it’s nothing.”
That sentence had pretty much become Armand’s catchphrase lately.
He often did things without thinking, but whenever Evelia asked if he needed help, he would just shake his head and let go of her hand.
“If you need help with anything, please tell me, Mr. Armand,” Evelia would always say politely.
Even now, she still used formal speech with him.
She had once tested the idea of calling him “husband,” but after seeing his slightly awkward reaction, she knew it didn’t feel right. So, she decided to stick with her usual way of calling him—“Mr. Armand.”
The current Armand had already forgotten many things. Sometimes he would suddenly remember things he had forgotten, but overall, he was confused more often than clear-headed.
Just a few days ago, he had already forgotten who Rachel was. When he saw a child running around the mansion, he had carefully asked Evelia whose child that was.
Evelia’s answer, of course, was quite a shock to him at the time, “Of course it’s our child, Mr. Armand.”
Until Evelia explained everything clearly to him, Armand kept doubting himself, wondering how much memory he had lost, how could the child already be that big?
“It’s fine. Really, I’m fine.”
When Evelia showed concern, Armand shook his head.
Evelia already knew he had the kind of personality where he wouldn’t talk about what was bothering him. Getting him to open up when he was keeping things inside was really, really difficult.
“Are you really okay, Mr. Armand?”
Evelia looked at him and tilted her head, as if doing one last check.
“Yeah, I’m really fine. I’m not—mmph?!”
Before Armand could finish giving his usual vague answer, Evelia suddenly kissed him forcefully.
The kiss caught him completely off guard. With his memory loss, he couldn’t handle something so intimate. He quickly pushed Evelia away.
“Evelia, what are you—?!”
By instinct, because he didn’t have any memory of this kind of closeness between them, he called her by her full name.
“You’re not calling me Eve anymore?” she asked softly.
“No... I mean... let’s put that aside for now. What are you trying to do?”
Back when they first met, Armand had given Evelia the nickname “Eve” to help him remember things more easily and to sound close.
But someone like Evelia was hard to forget. When talking to others, Armand had always referred to her by her full name, until their relationship grew closer, and “Eve” became natural to him.
“What do I mean? Nothing special.”
“…Huh?”
She had given the same vague reply that Armand always gave, like she was teasing or getting back at him a little.
“You—”
Armand started to argue back, but Evelia didn’t let him finish. She kissed him again, even more insistently this time, and her hands weren’t staying still either. With a small click, she undid one of his buttons.
“If Mr. Armand won’t talk, then I’ll just keep kissing you until you do.”
“But—mmph...!”
Evelia said that as if she was giving him a break to breathe, but she didn’t actually give him any chance to speak. She kept kissing him so intensely that he could barely get out a word.
“You’ve got to—at least let me talk!”
“You weren’t going to give a proper answer anyway.”
“No—I was just trying to—Eve—please, don’t—!”
With a thump, Evelia pushed Armand down onto the bed.
After several seconds of intense kissing, she sat on top of his stomach and finally let him catch his breath.
“Mr. Armand, do you want to say something now?”
“…Uh…”
Armand clearly looked embarrassed. He opened his mouth, seeing the pink strands of Evelia’s hair resting on his chest… but didn’t know what to say.
“Then I understand, Mr. Armand,” Evelia said gently.
She leaned down, her long hair brushing against his chest.
“If you can’t find the right words now, you can tell me later.”
Looks like this version of Evelia, who had been holding back her feelings for so long because Armand wasn’t doing well, finally needed a moment to let it all out.