Chapter 44: I Don’t Want to Be a Girl (Part 1)
After a while, Su Moyu washed off the makeup on her face.
She actually didn’t like the feeling of having things on her skin. And when she wore contact lenses, she couldn’t see clearly.
The long and busy day finally came to an end. After washing her face and brushing her teeth, Su Moyu curled up on the bed by herself.
The weather was getting colder. She reached out to close the curtains. The quiet of the countryside at night felt calm and gentle.
Lying on the bed, still wearing a thin nightdress, she felt waves of cold coming over her body. She curled up into a small ball, her hands and feet already cold and numb.
Su Moyu picked up her phone and saw a message from Zhou Ya.
“Susu, I had a fight with Shang Hanyu.”
There was also a crying emoji.
Su Moyu hesitated for a moment, but after thinking it over, she decided to comfort her.
“What happened?” she asked.
“He promised to go watch a movie with me tonight, but today the class teacher made him stay for an experiment. Then at night, he said he was too tired and didn’t want to go anymore,” Zhou Ya typed. “But I was already ready to go, and then he suddenly said he wouldn’t go.”
When Su Moyu read this, she almost couldn’t hold back.
Why was this so similar to the reasons she and Zhou Ya used to argue before?
“And then I got really angry. He kept saying he was too tired, like he didn’t care about my feelings at all.”
“Maybe sometimes people really don’t have enough energy to think about everything,” Su Moyu replied carefully, trying to comfort her. “If it were you doing experiments all day, you might also want to rest. After all, people have limited energy.”
After explaining for a while, Zhou Ya seemed to understand a bit.
“You’re right, I shouldn’t treat him like that. Thank you, Xiao Yu, you’re really so understanding,” Zhou Ya replied, adding a heart emoji.
Su Moyu gave a helpless smile, but her heart felt a little bitter.
It strangely felt like she had just helped her “rival”…
She looked up at Bai Shuchuan, who was lying beside her, and quietly moved a little closer to him.
Bai Shuchuan frowned slightly and glanced at her.
“Still cold? Do you want to add another blanket?”
Su Moyu shook her head and didn’t say anything.
She closed the chat window, feeling a bit heavy inside.
“But you still look cold,” Bai Shuchuan said. Seeing her body slightly shaking, he thought for a moment and moved a little closer to her.
Su Moyu felt the warmth from his back and smelled the faint scent on him.
“Alright, it’s solved now. He said we’ll pick another time. Thanks, Xiao Yu~”
Su Moyu saw another smiling bear emoji and could almost imagine Zhou Ya’s happy face.
“You’re welcome.”
“I really feel like you have a kind of gentleness that’s different from everyone else.”
Seeing that message, Su Moyu suddenly fell into deep thought again.
At this moment, she really didn’t know what to say, but many thoughts suddenly filled her heart.
Praise from her former girlfriend had somehow appeared again in this different timeline, now directed at her.
But now, they were only just friends.
“Sorry for the trouble,” Shang Hanyu also sent a message to thank her.
“It’s no trouble,” Su Moyu replied. When she looked at their matching profile pictures, she suddenly felt a bit jealous, and even a little resentment toward Shang Hanyu.
But no matter what she felt, she could only show them care and concern on the surface.
Because all her thoughts right now would seem unreasonable for the Su Moyu of this world.
If she had been a girl from the beginning, it would have been almost impossible for her to fall in love with Zhou Ya.
That unwilling feeling rose again. Su Moyu pressed her lips together, feeling her hair brush against her cheeks, while the frustration inside her surged to the extreme.
Why did she have to be reborn? Why did she become a girl in this life...
She put down her phone, and her nose suddenly felt sore.
Why did fate treat her like this? When she was young, people mocked her and called her feminine. She worked hard to live like a “normal” boy, and finally met someone she truly liked.
Just when her life had become stable, everything suddenly turned into this.
She didn’t want to be a girl...
She didn’t want to just stand by and watch. She hated her long hair, hated this awkward relationship with Bai Shuchuan, and hated being someone who could do nothing but watch the person she loved be with someone else.
Thinking of this, her vision became blurry. She put down her phone and carefully turned over, facing away from Bai Shuchuan.
“Are you going to sleep? Then I’ll turn off the light,” Bai Shuchuan’s gentle voice came from beside her. Su Moyu suddenly felt flustered and embarrassed.
Maybe it was her stubborn pride that made her not want him to see her like this.
“Su Moyu?” Bai Shuchuan called softly. He got up and looked at her face. She quickly covered her face with both hands, but the tight feeling in her throat and the sadness inside made her let out soft sobbing sounds.
Once the tears started falling, she couldn’t stop them. Her face scrunched up, and she cried uncontrollably.
Bai Shuchuan froze in place. He wanted to reach out and hug her, but then he remembered how she rejected him earlier that morning.
Tears kept sliding down her cheeks. He looked at her, not knowing what to do, and his mood became heavy.
“What’s wrong...?” After thinking for a long time, that was all he could say.
Su Moyu gently shook her head, which only made him more confused.
At that moment, he felt that he was being too cold. Looking at her small, crumpled face, he finally decided to pull her into his arms.
Her body was very soft. His arm wrapped around her waist. She didn’t resist. He could feel her body trembling slightly. Suddenly, she felt like a small kitten to him, and a warm feeling rose in his heart.
His body pressed against her back, feeling her softness.
But the next second, Su Moyu grabbed his hand and twisted away, breaking free from his embrace.
Bai Shuchuan immediately looked embarrassed. She turned around to face him, her eyes red, with tear marks still on her cheeks.
He felt like his words were stuck in his throat. He wanted to say something to comfort her, but before he could, the girl suddenly threw herself into his arms.
He paused for a moment, then wrapped his arms around her again.